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Lil Wayne Totally One-Ups Kanye

January 28, 2009
     Wrong. Wrong wrong wrong. Also, this guitar looks like Kenny Chesney would be attached to it. It's completely country. Couldn't you have picked a cooler guitar, Carter? Like maybe this one. That's totally Weezy. Weezy to the max. Weezy the slayer -- WEEZY THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS. Oh man, that's awesome. You should totally title your next album that. As long as it's not a rock album. Because you're a rapper, dumbass, and noone would pay to hear you play guitar with your hand full of thumbs if you weren't already well-known. Asshole. But I'm gonna totally buy that sworditar and slay you with my tasty, steel-bladed rock, probably screaming something climactic and awesome like, "It's time for my solo now!" Oh man, wouldn't that be awesome?

Wrong. Wrong wrong wrong. Also, this guitar looks like Kenny Chesney would be attached to it. It's completely country. Couldn't you have picked a cooler guitar, Carter? Like maybe a SWORDITAR. That would be totally Weezy.Weezy the slayer -- WEEZY THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS. Oh man, that's awesome. You should title your next album that. As long as it's not a rock album. Because you're a rapper, dumbass, and noone would pay to hear you play guitar with your hand full of thumbs if you weren't already well-known. Asshole. But I'm gonna totally buy a sworditar and slay you with my tasty, steel-bladed rock, probably screaming something climactic and awesome like, "It's time for my solo now!" Which would be nice. And would teach you a thing or two about rockin', Wayne. Because I know rockin'...

Hey, remember Kanye? Remember that time he put out an album of auto-tune warbling? Well, Lil Wayne thinks he can follow suit and just march out of the nice niche he’s made himself and venture into the world of rock. Someone’s been playing too much Guitar Hero, and it’s not just those guys who lived down the hall from me last year. Seriously, though, I was willing to give Kanye a chance, and he delivered a grower of an album, so no complaints there. With Wayne, I’m not as optimistic.

First of all, I think the only reason Kanye succeeded is because he bared his soul. Cliche as it may sound, Kanye seriously showed an emotional range which was simultaneously shocking and accessible. It was a gamble, and it paid off. The other thing Kanye did right is he made his own sound. He took auto-tune to the next level, making it the focus of a whole album, and symbolic of the sort of the correction he sought in his life throughout 808s.

Weezy has no such noble aspirations. This is Weezy taking on Axl. Seriously, dude, not everyone with dreads can rock. Hell, Axl can’t even rock all that well.

Unfortunately, this song isn’t terrible. That would make this all too easy. It’s decent. That’s the most I’ll give it. I don’t think I’d listen to it if it weren’t Weezy, but he’s probably counting on that. And when he does release his Rock Opus, hereafter referred to as Weezy’s Democracy, I’m sure I’ll give it a listen. Maybe not two, but it’ll get a spin.

The Single:

Prom Queen –Lil Wayne

And how Weezy should sound:

Yes ft. Pharrell – Lil Wayne


SWORDITAR.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. marquismeowmersiv permalink
    January 28, 2009 6:13 pm

    Marquis Meowmers IV declares Yes to be a fucking resounding success. Now I like 2 lil’ Wayne songs…

  2. hannah permalink
    February 1, 2009 3:09 pm

    I watched the first live performance of Prom Queen on the AT&T facebook page… it was completely horrible. And watching Weezy attempt to play the guitar was truly ridiculous… though he has improved on guitar choice since the picture in your article was taken.

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